Warning: Transparency Alert :)

1Pe 5:1-7 ESV

So I exhort the elders among you, as a fellow elder and a witness of the sufferings of Christ, as well as a partaker in the glory that is going to be revealed: (2) shepherd the flock of God that is among you, exercising oversight, not under compulsion, but willingly, as God would have you; not for shameful gain, but eagerly; (3) not domineering over those in your charge, but being examples to the flock. (4) And when the chief Shepherd appears, you will receive the unfading crown of glory. (5) Likewise, you who are younger, be subject to the elders. Clothe yourselves, all of you, with humility toward one another, for "God opposes the proud but gives grace to the humble." (6) Humble yourselves, therefore, under the mighty hand of God so that at the proper time he may exalt you, (7) casting all your anxieties on him, because he cares for you.

Have any of you ever "held on too tight?" By God's grace I've had a couple of weeks to reflect, pray, and take another look at where I am with the Lord. I've realized that if I'm going to "finish my race," I need to become pretty good at casting my anxieties on Him. I won't finish otherwise.

Regardless of the sphere of Kingdom leadership, I'm learning that if there is not a continual "dying to self," a constant refocusing on Christ, and a surrendering of leadership (and those you lead) back to God over and over again, so many bad things can occur:

Pride
Anger
Frustration
Loss of joy and faith
And the one that gets me the most: a continual anxiety and insecurity that drains the joy from ministry.

For many months after my father passed away, I was actually dreading Sundays! I walked into my church nervous. "Is this the day the message is rejected?" "Who is going to leave this week?" "Will I make it to my car before I get more bad news?" It began to take a real effort to leave my office to enter the sanctuary. Seriously.

Now yes...some of that is the devil. No doubt. But some of that is just me: a weak, sinful, fragile man who began to focus a bit too much on himself and how he felt and not enough on Christ. The Lord showed me this clearly in His Word and prayer.

It is to Christ alone that glory belongs. It is to Christ alone that we will answer! It is Christ alone that opens the hearts of His people to hear. It is Christ alone who must be preached. And it is Christ alone who grows, holds, and advances His church!

So to all the anxieties I've sinfully held on to, I cast them upon Christ. I'm so glad He cares!

To CRCC...I ask your forgiveness for any flesh I've allowed in the pulpit...whether you realized it or not. And to CRCC...we again pledge to place Christ at the center...not just in our words (which I think we've done) but also in our motivations (the hard part of leadership). In our desire to Reach, Teach, and Release people, we will attempt that God's way. We will hold to Scripture with as much love as we can muster. We will take our lumps when they come but we will be faithful!

So dear reader, what about you? Could you stand to do a little "casting" today? :) :)

Proverbs 12:25 ESV - Anxiety in a man's heart weighs him down, but a good word makes him glad.

From Foxe's Book of Martyrs:

The Third Persecution, Under Trajan, A.D. 108

In the third persecution Pliny the Second, a man learned and famous, seeing the lamentable slaughter of Christians, and moved therewith to pity, wrote to Trajan, certifying him that there were many thousands of them daily put to death, of which none did any thing contrary to the Roman laws worthy of persecution. "The whole account they gave of their crime or error (whichever it is to be called) amounted only to this-viz. that they were accustomed on a stated day to meet before daylight, and to repeat together a set form of prayer to Christ as a God, and to bind themselves by an obligation-not indeed to commit wickedness; but, on the contrary-never to commit theft, robbery, or adultery, never to falsify their word, never to defraud any man: after which it was their custom to separate, and reassemble to partake in common of a harmless meal."

In this persecution suffered the blessed martyr, Ignatius, who is held in famous reverence among very many. This Ignatius was appointed to the bishopric of Antioch next after Peter in succession. Some do say, that he, being sent from Syria to Rome, because he professed Christ, was given to the wild beasts to be devoured. It is also said of him, that when he passed through Asia, being under the most strict custody of his keepers, he strengthened and confirmed the churches through all the cities as he went, both with his exhortations and preaching of the Word of God. Accordingly, having come to Smyrna, he wrote to the Church at Rome, exhorting them not to use means for his deliverance from martyrdom, lest they should deprive him of that which he most longed and hoped for. "Now I begin to be a disciple. I care for nothing, of visible or invisible things, so that I may but win Christ. Let fire and the cross, let the companies of wild beasts, let breaking of bones and tearing of limbs, let the grinding of the whole body, and all the malice of the devil, come upon me; be it so, only may I win Christ Jesus!" And even when he was sentenced to be thrown to the beasts, such as the burning desire that he had to suffer, that he spake, what time he heard the lions roaring, saying: "I am the wheat of Christ: I am going to be ground with the teeth of wild beasts, that I may be found pure bread."

Trajan being succeeded by Adrian, the latter continued this third persecution with as much severity as his predecessor. About this time Alexander, bishop of Rome, with his two deacons, were martyred; as were Quirinus and Hernes, with their families;

Zenon, a Roman nobleman, and about ten thousand other Christians.

In Mount Ararat many were crucified, crowned with thorns, and spears run into their sides, in imitation of Christ's passion. Eustachius, a brave and successful Roman commander, was by the emperor ordered to join in an idolatrous sacrifice to celebrate some of his own victories; but his faith (being a Christian in his heart) was so much greater than his vanity, that he nobly refused it. Enraged at the denial, the ungrateful emperor forgot the service of this skilful commander, and ordered him and his whole family to be martyred.

At the martyrdom of Faustines and Jovita, brothers and citizens of Brescia, their torments were so many, and their patience so great, that Calocerius, a pagan, beholding them, was struck with admiration, and exclaimed in a kind of ecstasy, "Great is the God of the Christians!" for which he was apprehended, and suffered a similar fate.

Many other similar cruelties and rigors were exercised against the Christians, until Quadratus, bishop of Athens, made a learned apology in their favor before the emperor, who happened to be there and Aristides, a philosopher of the same city, wrote an elegant epistle, which caused Adrian to relax in his severities, and relent in their favor.

Adrian dying A.D. 138, was succeeded by Antoninus Pius, one of the most amiable monarchs that ever reigned, and who stayed the persecutions against the Christians